It's a heart-wrenching story. When I hear some of the issues going on in Mormon Land, I usually say to myselfв. Submit a new text post.
I know a lot of Mormons who were also not raised on fear and guilt and strict gender rolesвbut I was, as were many of my peers. Expect her to either write you off during her mission or pressure you to show interest in the church. I seriously questioned the future of our relationship based on that fact alone. I have my own profession and my own interests, and was definitely not pursuing a doctor for intimate partnership, but I quickly realized that my environment started seeing me as only girlfriend of Dr. That is the million dollar question.
I adore the show New Normal and one of my favorite episodes is when Bryan decides to go back to church and the Father is so cool with him. While it's true that Mormons are not one-dimensional and completely predictable, the odds of a successful relationship, given the OP's description of his girlfriend, are slim. Doctors aren't always the greatest finds. Not his wife and kids. By those standards, I was a failure, my husband wasn't "good enough" - and my daughter had ambitious real goals that required a lot of time and effort. It's been really tough and am only hoping to see a glimpse of the reward soon, whether it is simply watching a movie and actually finish it in one sitting or finally having dinner in the same room. Also, as Joanna points out, men and women already inhabit a separate culture.
What advice do you have for a newbie. Then be clear you will never convert. She is considered "an old maid" by Mormon standards, so she may be willing to marry you--hoping you will convert someday --but she will constantly be reminded that your marriage is inferior to the "Eternal Families" of sealed Mormons, and she will fear dying and never seeing her loved ones again. Mormons follow the law of Chastity; they believe that the intimate act of lovemaking must be saved for after marriage. Mormons can be pretty crazy without it. I couldn't stop thinking about it all day after reading it.